Day 40 prompt: hanging

 

I sent the kids to school,

Then downed some cabernet,

Glued daisies to my forehead

And ate a ball of clay.

 

I cranked up some Beethoven

My favorite – his third.

The music made me antsy.

My confidence was stirred.

 

I felt like making mischief,

So I headed into town.

I drove the tractor sideways,

Still in my red nightgown.

 

The ATM was busy,

So I walked into the bank,

Smiled at the teller,

Then fired just one blank.

 

No one found it funny.

In fact, they were quite pissed.

An officer shot back at me.

Thankfully, he missed.

 

I cartwheeled past two guards

To my tractor in the street.

I drove it through the market

And snagged some sausage meat.

 

I think I dropped my handbag

In my hastiness to flee.

No matter. All it had inside

Were coupons and ID.

 

I’m home and feeling spunky

And high from all the fun.

You should have seen their faces

When I fired off that gun!

 

What? Do I hear knocking?

More like frantic banging.

I think the sheriff’s here for me.

I’ll have to leave you ha …